Chicken Little Gets Fight Clubbed

DATELINE: NOV 6:  Hordes of children were irrevocably traumatized last week during a showing of Disney's Chicken Little when they were subjected to a graphic depiction of suicide. The reels had inadvertently been switched with a Spanish art flick, "Andrea." "It's pandemonium," Joshua Gallo, 30, told a reporter as he rushed out of the theater with his 5-year-old son and 1-year-old daughter. "The kids are crying. The mothers are screaming for the managers to stop the film." Did the reporter happen to be munching popcorn nearby? Or, in the midst of crisis, a horrific event forever scarring his children, the dad said, oh shit, I bet I could call this in and get in the paper! Thankfully, however, all the patrons received a free movie coupon. Read more.